Restless- a note as I lay on the beach.

Last night I couldn’t sleep. I was worrying. My mind kept racing. Trying to solve the puzzle of my career and my life. “Which way is the right way? Is there a shortcut? Who should I know?What should I know about them? How can I be more knowledgeable?  How can I get ahead? How can I better myself?”  Every day I wake up and all I think about is my dreams and how I’m going to make them a reality. “What is my purpose? Am I staying true to it?” 

I have inner battles with myself. “You’re working too hard. Time to play, stop working so hard. “ Sometimes I feel like I’m a Nazi. I’m controlling. I try to mold myself to be this perfect ideal of what I think I should be. And I’m determined. I stop at nothing to mold myself into my vision. 

then I lay down and I realize that sometimes you have to learn how to clock out. How can you clock out of something that you’re creating in your mind? It’s not a regular Office job that you just walk into and leave at 6 o’clock. No.

I SURRENDER. Thank God for the beach. Thank God for meditation. Thank GOD for yoga. Thank God for eating well. ThANK God for love. Thank God for people in the world WHO bring you peace and keep you grounded. I thank God for the church. Thank God for gratitude. Thank God for being there for you when you feel lost. He’s ALWAYS right there behind you, waiting for you to come crying into his arms. Only for you to realize that he’s been there all along.

So yes at times I am REST-less. Then I close my eyes and I sing to you. I release myself into you. I stray away from the judgment. I stray away from the negativity. I stray away from task provoking & living in the next moment. 

we are all A happening. WE must just focus on the moment in front of US. Life is a beautiful, BEAUTIFUL thing that we must never take for granted. may we always live in the moment, may we always strive for greatness. May we always seek clarity. May we always feel peaceful. May we always feel safe in your arms. May we feel protected. 

 Thank you God for my rest-less-ness, as it brings me closer to you. 💛✨😌🦋🙏🏻